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Some time ago, Sissy got offended by a brother. There was a misunderstanding and then she got accused by him.

At first, Sissy thought that the young man would come around, realize his wrongs and ask for forgiveness, but he didn’t.

She tried to ignore the slander coming from the young man but it was a difficult thing to do.

Her pain was procured from the fact that such a mature Christian as that would make such statements. 

As a godly woman, Sissy tried not to engage in a heated argument with him.

The little she did was to calmly try to clear up the misunderstanding.

Yet, it  was as if her calmness escalated the young man’s anger as he continued to pour out his rage on her.

Some weeks passed and everything returned to normal. Sissy continued with her life. She did not want to remember the incidence that had happened.

Her silence in the face of the slander showed that she overcame the temptation. There was no need to remember what transpired.

Some time later, in church, Sissy listened attentively as the preacher exhorted the congregation on the need to forgive and forget one another’s offenses.

The preacher went ahead to quote a verse from the scripture that says “… love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” Matthew 5:44

At that moment, the Holy Spirit opened the eyes of Sissy to what she didn’t know!

He unfolded her heart and made it bare before her. There were still traces of grudge within her. All along, she had borne grudges towards her offender. It was subtly hidden in the innermost part of her heart.

After the church service, Sissy resolved to call her offender and boldly affirmed her forgiveness.

Grudge is a paramount issue in the body of Christ. 

Sometimes we get so offended by people that we feel we should knock them down or throw them over the fence.

Other times, we feel we have truly forgiven our offender but when a proper heart check is done, traces of grudge would be found in our hearts.

The devil may lay grievances in one’s heart in such a tricky way that one may not easily detect. 

That is why a heart check carried out by the Omniscient Holy Spirit is important. On our own, we may never get to find out. 

The Psalmist understood this and said in Psalm 139:23-24:

“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

One way to discover that you hold grudges towards your offenders is that you try to withhold help from them when you are in a position to. Or you get dissatisfied while helping them and constantly refer to their wrong towards you. 

That is not the life Christ mapped out for us. We are to truly forgive our offenders. When it seems difficult to do, we must give up our will and ask God for his power to let go.

When we forgive thoroughly, it shows we carry the nature of God. He forgives us when we err and remembers those offenses no more.

True forgiveness brings peace of mind. It is even a prerequisite for us to be forgiven by God.

Matt. 6:14 “For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.

Matt. 6:15 “But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.

It is essential that believers ask the Holy Spirit to teach them how to not give or take offenses.

That way, we get more tolerating towards others and our environment filled with love and stability.